Attending Spanking Parties

Community Experiences

Oh my, I was so nervous when I attended my first spanking party. I forgot my name and just kept putting this rock candy at the registration table in my mouth. -- Rachel

For those thinking of attending a spanking party or munch, it's well worth it. It takes nerve the first time – and is unnerving. Participants are diverse and friendly. Beyond the spanking, it’s so nice to be in a giant room with dozens or hundreds of spankos. It’s refreshing to be able to speak openly about an interest that is just part of us and, for most of us, always was part of our being.

There are all sorts of parties – big, national parties, smaller ones in many cities throughout the country (and world) and house parties. There are also D/s or S&M parties that may include spanking, but they are very different. If you are a 100% spanko and have not been to an event, it’s probably best to find a purer spanking party then decide if you want to venture out. Friendly people everywhere but the “dungeon D&S parties” are very different.

Here are a few tips you may want to consider if you have long thought of attending a spanking party but just too concerned to have your intentions match your actions:

o Attend a munch. You keep your pants up, as does everyone else. There is no spanking, but it gives you an opportunity to meet others and feel more comfortable.

o Possibly go with a friend. Years ago, I bought a vanilla friend to a spanking event just so I had someone who could go with me when I was in New York City with him. I knew he was not one to judge and we had a good time there, but he certainly isn’t one of us.

o Get to know someone at a munch or via emails, meet for a bit to eat before a party and come in together. Walking into the room the first time with someone else provides a level of comfort.

o In advance of the party, email the organizer(s) and introduce yourself. Often they will be willing to connect you with someone they trust or will spend a few minutes with you at the party to get your comfortable, so you are not walking in cold.

Remember, when you attend a party, you are not consenting to being spanked or having to spank someone else. Normally, they provide a color system indicating if you are a top (spanker), bottom (spankee), switch (you like both), or just an observer. You can change your designation privately with someone you meet so if you go as a top, for example, and then talk with someone and both agree you will spank him or her, that’s fine. Conversely, if you are color coated as a top and someone wants you to spank them and you are just spanked out or not interested in spanking the person, it’s fine to decline. You have all the power – if you are a spanker or spankee.

After an hour or so, I realized that the people were not going to spank me unless I consented. Remember, back then I was the one who mostly was spanked! Jack took me over his lap and spanked me. It was wild that people were watching me being scolded and spanked. After the first time, I asked him if he would take me to a different room so people were not right there, witnessing me being treated like I was 15 years old. He took my hand and led me into the room and pulled down my jeans again but, this time, instead of spanking me over my white panties, he lowered them. He announced that this was the ‘bare bottom room!” Of course, he was just making up the rules but I did not know better at that point.

Getting that bare bottom spanking from someone I trusted led me to allow other men to take me over their lap and spanked me on the bare bottom – in front of others, including Jack. I was well spanked that weekend.

Jack: Even though I had considerable experience spanking women, I was nervous when I attended my first spanking party. A kind friend came down and brought me up to the room. I’m rarely nervous but that was one of the times. Once I walked into the room, I saw an older man – in his late 70’s – with a woman over his lap. She was about his age but had an incredibly fit body and nice red bottom displayed for all to see. It made me feel good that this couple found their place – and I found my place at less than half their age.

Later I was talking with a guy who had just spanked his adorable wife. While talking with him, she started to brat, with her bratty attention focused on me. Her husband said something like, “Are you going to deal with that?” It took a few seconds, perhaps longer, for it to register that he was giving me permission to spank his wife and her behavior at a spanking party was asking for a spanking from this stranger, me.

Reluctantly, I took her over my lap and within a minute or two of her encouragement and her husband’s smile, I started to give her a convincing hand spanking. Her husband tossed a wooden hairbrush over to me saying how my hand alone would not convince her. I took another breath but that was the first of many times that I spanked that young lady. Later he would write a list of her transgressions, and I would deal with them. I always wondered why a spanko like him would contract out his wife’s discipline.

Rachel: The best part of the spanking parties for my husband and myself is that we are in a group of people who share this unique, special interest.

Spanking parties – and other kink events – are fun, safe, and ways to feel hugged by others who have similar interests. We have had so many good, interesting, and fun experiences at these community events. Expect to hear more.

It’s also important for this blog to have an exchange of ideas and experiences. For those who have thought about attending a party but haven’t, please share what might be holding you back. And, for those who have attended a party, please share your favorite experience.